Oh gosh friends – I get SO frustrated with life. You too?

Like, why cant I make it all go right? 

Why can’t I have my people back? 

Why can’t I FIX all the things …. 

I tried so hard to help heal my mom’s cancer. I tried so hard to fix my marriage & fight my husband’s demons for him. 

I did EVERYTHING I could think of to get the outcome that I so desperately wanted and it was hard, it was frustrating and it was pointless.

I have slowly and painfully learned through a lot of trial, error, and head-banging, that there is nothing I can do to control the outcome. I can do the work. I can put in the time. I can hope and pray and do “all the things” but at the end of the day – what God has for us is going to happen regardless – because some things, only God can do. 

When my mom was diagnosed with cancer, I did everything I could to help heal her. I expected her to eat all the “superfoods”, I called all the best specialists for her type of cancer. I prayed nonstop for God to heal her body. I mean, I KNEW there was only so much I could do – but i prayed every minute and did everything possible and was convinced she’d be healed.

When my husband started showing signs of mental illness, I took him to all the best therapists, we did all the various medication treatments, and I micromanaged his every waking moment. I prayed constantly for God to cure his mind. I didn’t let anything slip through the cracks

Friends – I was convinced, without a shadow of a doubt – that I could fix all of my problems.

If I worked harder, prayed stronger, and did more … I would get the outcomes I so desperately needed. 

And boy was I humbled!

I wasn’t just frustrated – I was powerless. I was doing EVERYTHING and still knew I wasn’t doing enough. I could never do enough. I wasn’t going to cure cancer or mental illness. Who was I kidding?! 

And when neither of them got better, I finally understood – ONLY God.

And if ONLY God can do it – then I have to accept the fact that there is a reason. If my wants/desires/needs were not met, in spite of all my efforts, then I have to recognize that he has a different outcome for me. For us!

it is SO easy to get angry and bitter at not getting what we are convinced is for us. Why work so hard and care so much for nothing? 

I dont have the answer to that, friends. I struggle with this question a lot.

All I know is that we have to try, but we also have to trust God to finish what we can’t. And if he doesn’t, we have to accept that it just wasn’t meant for us.

When something is important in our lives, I certainly dont think we should just sit back and do nothing and just “hope for the best”. But I do think these are the situations that call for our faith to kick in and kick us in the butt. Stop thinking you can play God. Stop thinking you know as much as our Almighty. Stop assuming that what you want to happen is what should happen!

Only God can change a heart, a season, a mind. Only God can heal a broken heart. Only God can transform your pain into a superpower. Will you let him?

Friends – do your best, do what you can, and do all the things you think can help – but do all of that while simultaneously giving it to God and trusting him to take the situation where it ultimately needs to go. 

My prayer for you today is that you tap into your faith to relinquish control and give God the opportunity to prove his ultimate love and plan for your life. If you’re frustrated, surrender to your father and let him carry it to the finish line (whatever that may look like)

You’ve got this because God’s got this. 

Drop the frustration and pick up the faith. Amen! 

XO

Taylor